Boost

Boost lives a not so quiet life in the suburbs which he self describes as the ghetto. He was born before Kike and created him and everything that came after. God has described him as his right and left hand man. Usually seen parading around in T-Mobile merch (which he is sole sponsor and stakeholder of) captivating all who he encounters and working out until his muscles explode and regenerate into bigger, stronger muscles.

Triassic Period
More than 200 million years ago Boostacio had grown bored of everything he and God had created and decided to create an impossible amalgamation which they came to name Kike.

As Kike grew and manifested his own thoughts and goals Boost felt threatened. During a charity concert set up by Kike to raise money so he could graft Pterodactyl wings onto himself to fly, Boost sent an asteroid crashing into Earth. This eliminated all life but Kike's, who managed to escape by sacrificing half his brain.

Dark Ages
During the 20st century Boostacio betrayed God and was cast down to Earth to live amongst mortals. During his first decades on this planet he took to working undercover at a local Braum's Ice Cream Shop and became known as The Heart of the Freljord, Braumstacio.

T-Mobile
After years of feeling used by Corporate America, Braumstacio forsook his namesake and left the Braum's Ice Cream Company. He continued his undercover work in order to ascend back to Heaven with the company T-Mobile. During these years, now known as Telecomstacio, Boost joined the T-Mobile board of directors after assassinating and assuming the identity of Jhonadab Legere. Telecomstacio would go on to be the driving force of the T-Mobile/Sprint Merger.

AT&T
Telecomstacio, the master strategist, planned to leave T-Mobile soon before the Great Merger in order to reap maximum benefits. To this end he stepped down from T-Mobile and worked at a local AT&T store as a regular salesman, until the coast was clear.

Armageddon
Now a rich and successful man, Boost has assumed the name Insuredstacio and works as an insurance broker for the poor. This was his retirement plan to live comfortably while working minimal hours, and through this becoming the most noble man to ever exist and therefore be allowed to sit next to God once again. However, to thwart his plans, God unleashed a deadly plague known as Coronavirus upon Earth. It is unknown at this time how long this has set Boost's plan back but at the COVID-19 resolution we shall update with further knowledge.

As of 2021 the most civilized parts of the world have been completely vaccinated against Covid-19 thanks to a most generous donation from one Jhonadab Legere, who willed his fortune from an earlier MegaMerger to the countries most in need after succumbing to Covid-19 himself. Since then vaccines have been developed and distributed at world record pace. Only those with the proper knowledge are aware that Jhonadab Legere is actually a pseudonym for who is currently known as Covidstacio.

Covidstacio has been making sure from behind the scenes that everything possible is done to thwart Covid-19, which unbeknowst to the populace is itself a plan to thart Covidstacio's plan to get back his rightfull place next to God. At this time, however, it is though that Covidstacio has decided to forsake his throne and gone against God as his latest move was to release what is known as Booster shots to those who are already vaccinated. The Booster shots inject people with particles of Boost himself, in the process everyone that recieves one will become one with Boost and eventually he will assimilate all of humanity and bring about the Unimind and New World Order therefore becoming the antichrist and engaging in an epic, final, mortal combat against God himself, his only brother.

Mum Fiasco
Under the alias Mumacita, Mum visited The DFW Metroplex during the fateful year of 2018. During this visit she took shelter in Boost's home. During her stay she witnessed all manner of things from Boost like his workout routine and perfect living and eating habits. This made Mum almost fall in love with Boost, who had already declared victory and changed his alias to Mumstacio. However, during a trip to Six Flags Mum saw Luis Fonsi: Live on a Rollercoaster and immediately fell in love with his gigantic nose, forgetting about Boost, who would be come known as Depresstacio for some time. This would also mark Boost's exit from Tokyo.TV, a loss that could never be recovered.

Carro Del Año
During his years at T-Mobile, Boost earned a significant amount of money from commission. With this newly acquired liquidity he decided to buy a Model of the Year vehicle which has been christened: La Mamalona and has won multiple J.D. Power Awards. The most notable of these awards being "Vehicle Owned by the Greatest Person", which J.D. Power has only awarded once in its entire existence. (J.D. Power himself was present for this award)

Gucci vs Louis Vuitton
After leaving the Telecom industry, Boost acquired a great amount of wealth from the Tmo/Sprint merger. With this immense amount of money, Boost looked into investing into symbols of status. During this time is when Boost asked everyone he could possibly think of whether a Gucci wallet or a LV wallet would be a smarter investment. All his constituents replied in kind: "Just buy a Walmart wallet" to which Boost took offense. He then took on the form of Yamista-Ci-Oh! and built a deck of Credit Cards with which to send everyone with a Credit Score of 750 or less to the Shadow Realm.

Collectible Trading
During the Coronavirus Pandemic unleashed by God to thwart Boost's plans to return to heaven, Boost took to passing the time by buying video games from the 21th century. Under the alias Gamecubestacio, Boost spends his quarantine days visiting retro gaming stores around the Tri-State Area and swindling high profile collectible gaming merchandise for dirt cheap prices, which he then resells online for a huge profit margin. Only the future will tell if Boost will earn enough of a positive yield to reach Javs' "On the Low Low" prowess.

Lily Pichu
Boost briefly met Lily Pichu at a gaming convention in the year 2017. After their brief meeting, Pichu was flabbergasted by Boost and extended him an invite to that night's Twitch After Party. At this event is where Lily Pichu would come to fall in love with Boost after dancing to Slow Dancing in the Dark by Joji for 15 minutes straight.

After that fateful night their love would be kindled for some time, until Boost, too confident in his abilities to be an unstoppable force of love and lust, would comment under a Pokimane IG post and be forever scorned.



Pokimane
After his marriage to Lily Pichu had grown stale, Boost was craving a more interactive relationship, both emotionally and sexually. It was because of this that he decided to give Pokimane the best compliment she's ever received to date:Pokimane was left speechless. Boost was forced to slide into her DM's and confront her with another message:After this, Pokimane immediately melted and was taken to a nearby hospital for reconstruction. As soon as she could walk however, she escaped from her room. After a few day she returned and doctors had to treat her for "having her back blown out". To this day the details of what transpired during these few days are, at best, hazy.

Phoenix Home
During a tragic incident in 2014, while executing a beta test of his plan to burn down Mike Smith's property, after learning of his relationship with Krytal Loya, Boost accidentally set fire to his own garage. This prompted the immediate evacuation of his entire family to a nearby Home Wood Suites while Boost himself extinguished the fire with his own spit and rebuilt a perfect replica of his home from the ashes and ruins strewn about.

Revenge of La Mamalona
During a peaceful August night, a drunk driver approached Boost's home at 45mph with a Ford F150. This F150, known as La Mamalona, tore through Boost's room wall from the outside and claimed his life. The driver of the Mamalona fled the scene.

After three days Boost rose again and sought revenge by turning into Evil Nosetaciodab: his final form. The driver of La Mamalona suffered all manner of punishment. His body was never recovered, but it is speculated that he was obliterated into such tiny pieces that he now covers the entirety of Earth's atmosphere like a blanket.

This is the only time Boost has been forced to ascend to his final form. Let us hope it will never happen again.